Just a few stitches…

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It’s probably going to take you the better half of 2 years to finish crocheting this thing, and you’re gonna drip tea on it? Hell, if I spent that long on something that takes a double-ought hook to work up, that thing is getting framed
and hung in the national gallery.

And what contest did this thing win in?
The BORE THE HELL OUT OF PEOPLE WHO CROCHET BY FORCING THEM TO REPEAT THE SAME MOTIF OVER AND OVER AGAIN competition?

Can you top this?

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Let’s see, we have a snowman, a dog, a cat… a goose in need of a chiropractor… a bear taking a bath? What the Hell? … And is that a banana? Hanging on that knob it looks like the eye of some horrible fruit mimic just waiting for you to wash your hands.

Look, I realize that designing within the confines of plastic canvas can be a challenge, but at one point, you’re gonna have to decide if drying your hands is worth the humiliation of owning one of these things.