On the cape

oct2015j

The only issue I have with this pattern is that it’s not available in my size.
Seriously, look at the bat cape. LOOK AT IT!!
I don’t want this pattern for Halloween; I want it to wear to the grocery store.
Damn your preconceived notions of what a grown man should wear to purchase frozen vegetables, I WANT FOX EARS!!

How much is that mechanical doggie in the window?

 

Today on Sad Patterns, we’re starting something different. Instead of looking to the past, we are looking towards the future – the grim, bleak, horrible-pattern infested future.

This section will include current (as of the post date) pattern stock. Yeah, I’m scared too.

So, strap in folks, ’cause we’re traveling on the highway to the danger zone.

SAD PATTERNS PROUDLY(?) PRESENTS:

CONTEMPORARY CALAMITIES!
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The dog on the right desperately wants to die
That’s a “kill me now” face if I’ve ever seen one.

Look, I get that people like Steampunk stuff; heck, I’ve even made some funky jewelry pieces with gears myself, but honestly people, your dog doesn’t deserve this level of humiliation.

Forcing Fido to wear awful costumes with  a ‘Victoriana meets auto mechanic’ theme could be punishable by law. Well, probably not law, but if I ever see your dog wearing something this stupid, I will definitely be judging you.