Happy families


While on a nice outing to the city…

Mom: “Sweetie, don’t eat so much! You’ll spoil your supper.”

Kid: “Shut it, lady. I’ll eat what I want, when I want!”

Dad: “Don’t talk to your mother like that, you little shit, and gimmie back my Cracker Jacks!”

Kid: “You can pry ’em out of my cold, dead hands, old man.”

Dad: “Kid, you’re about 5 seconds away from being a murder statistic.”

Kid: “You old gas bag, you’re about as intimidating as a wet sponge!”

Mom: “I regret the choices I’ve made in life.”


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