Could you bear to lose it?


“Here sweetie, I’ve made you a Frankenstein abomination of plastic and yarn. Have fun playing with it until you lose the buttons, and bear parts start to litter the living room carpet.”


Oh no she didn’t


Jenny always tried to be a professional model, but when that modeling job-stealing bitch Suzy walked on to the set, she couldn’t help but give her a disapproving look.

It’s in the bag


OK, so who wrote this? Lynn Paulin or Betty McKay?
Look, if I’m buying a book that shows me how to make the world’s ugliest bags and belts, I’d appreciate not having the added confusion of which author’s name I need to be cursing as I walk down the street fending off public ridicule from wearing them.