Try to get my best side


Meanwhile, at the camera store…

Guy on left: “You mean that guy, back there? I dunno, he seems kinda square…”

Guy on right: “No, he’s perfect! Looks just like the kinda guy who’d be into filming us doing, well, you know. I’ve seen him here before and he seems kinda into that sort of stuff.”

Guy on left: ” Alright, I’ll go talk to him, but you know, getting this stuff on camera isn’t going to be everyone’s cup of tea. He might say no, or worse…”

Guy on right: “It’ll be fine; I’ll keep my fingers crossed. Man, I really hope he says yes. I mean, I’d prefer to film it ourselves, but we’re going to need tight zooms and all kinds of angles.  I want to make sure to catch every little movement!!”

Guy on left: “OK, OK, calm down; I’m going to ask him. Look, if I’m sticking my neck out and chatting this guy up to film us, you’d better stop day dreaming and finish the plans for our magic act. Getting it on camera is one thing, but we’ll never make it on America’s Got Talent if you don’t work out the ‘sawing me in half’ routine!”


Rest room?


Ah yes, because going to the bathroom wasn’t hard enough.
Now you get the added pleasure to having a little ethnic doll
stare at you and judge your eating habits as you sit on the toilet
and contemplate your regretful decision to have a third helping of chili.

Dusting in style


And the point of a sheer apron is… what, exactly?
Aprons are supposed to protect your clothes when making messes; so, unless this thing is made of some hereto unknown material that repels stains,
that little black dress is history.
The other option is that she put on the apron to host her party. That would explain the heels, but in all fairness, she just might just like to “Donna Reed” the house even when no company has been invited.
Regardless of the reason, girlfriend still missing her string of pearls.

A tisket, a tasket


By the time you finished this hideous dust collector, you could have read one of the recipes you were going to store in it, grown carrots, harvested them, washed and chopped them, mixed them with other ingredients, baked a carrot cake, frosted it, eaten it AND have the dishes washed and put away all before bed time.