I’m going to dye

SAD PATTERNS PRESENTS:

VEST-ED INTERESTSjun2013zWell, I know I can certainly feel the hot, passionate excitement oozing from this pattern. Nothing says youthful, scholastic elation like grayscale patchwork and these pictures can barely contain the joy the models are exuding. Normally after a photo shoot, there is some sort of cocktail hour get-together to talk about how exhilarating the event was, but judging by the oh so imaginative color schemes of those vests, I’m sure this group of intrepid youngsters went straight home for a tall glass of prune juice and a hard nap.

Advertisements

Too short

jun2013xThe lady is innocuous enough, but let’s face it, the guy on the right looks like he got his track shorts and boxer shorts mixed up. It’s difficult for a man to get away with any printed pants, but add the fact that he looked like he got dressed in the dark and people will start to feel sorry for him.

“Oh, poor guy. he can’t even dress himself. He needs a good woman help him pick out is clothes…”

Hey. Wait a minute. This pattern just might be a clever device used to pick up women.

Well played Simplicity. Well played.

Nice to meet ya…

jun2013vGuy #4 to guy #3 in upper left: “Well hey there, bright young thing. Got any plans after the photo shoot?”

Guy #3 in upper left to guy #4: “Back off creeper. I’m kinda not into wannabe studs who dress like overgrown boy scouts in pee-pee yellow shirts”

Guy #4 to guy #3 in upper left: “Kinda not? So you’re saying there’s still a chance, eh?”

On Track

jun2013uI always wondered where the ‘wear track suits off the track’ trend started, and now we all know. Now, I’m not sure how many women do their exercises in a skirt, turtleneck and stacked-heel boots, but hey, if Simplicity can eliminate just one wardrobe change in your hectic day, more power to them!

 

You’re such a yo-yo!

SAD PATTERNS PRESENTS:

VEST-ED INTERESTS!

jun2013tA vest AND A matching necklace?

Wow, now I have even more of this crap to hang off of my body at the same time! Imagine the look on everyone’s jealous faces when they get a load of me and my head to toe ensemble of leftover scraps and birdhouse appliques! Is that a country gingham chicken AND one mitten?? Sure is!

It’s like I died and went to vest heaven!

And if I’m not dead, please tell me how I can die so that I’ll never have to look at this pattern again. Thanks.