The wider, the better…

Medical green palazzo pants?

It looks like a registered nurse is going from the operating room to a rumba competition.


Deja vu all over again!

Now, I’m all for paying homage to the past when it comes to design. It is virtually impossible to make clothes now-a-days without referencing something from the annals of fashion history; however, this Simplicity pattern seems to go a bit too far with its reference to a dress Yves St. Laurent made back in the 60’s. St. Laurent was inspired by the stark, linear work of Piet Mondrian’s modern abstract paintings. Obviously, Mondrian wins the race, considering it’s his work that started the ball rolling, but it just goes to show you how something so exclusive, like a painting, can get diffused down to the masses.

Here’s the breakdown:

One of the original paintings (Mondrian did a series of them):

St. Laurent’s dress:

Simplicity pattern:

Those dance lessons really paid off!

What exactly are they staring at?

Guy on left: “Damn! I had no idea that was physically possible. I can’t imagine how long it took to perfect those moves.”

Guy in middle: “Who knew that any woman could be this nimble and graceful on a stripper pole. Dang Mark, you have the most awesome wife in the world. It’s a good thing I brought my binoculars, so I can catch all the details at every angle!”

Guy on right (Mark): “Pay attention fellas, here comes the part of the routine she likes to call ‘around the world’!”

Ship ahoy!

I don’t know when Donald Duck became a fashion icon, but apparently the patternmaking companies thought they hit pay-dirt with these nautical sewing gems. Dressing like a sailor is appropriate for little boys under the age of 8, for women who have already given birth to their first child… not so much. I’m all for women taking cues from menswear and making it their own, but I can think of more interesting outfits than a bell bottom-clad cast extra from The Village People’s “In The Navy” video.

Let us give thanks…

“…And then children, the brave pilgrims set off across the vast ocean to colonize America. When they arrived on the rocky shores, they presented the natives with crocheted pants, dresses and matching headbands, all stitched in boring earth tones. The catatonic, twin squirrels just stood there in awe as the baby’s breath rapidly grew in around them. Then they all sat down to a turkey dinner, lovingly prepared by the matriarch of the family. The turkey was dry, but no one complained, because they all knew if someone made a snide comment about Ma’s bird, they would get slapped.”


No bones about it!

Emily was proud of the new sweater she had made. It was the first time she completed a knitted garment. The final product fit, was comfortable and made her happy. Every day after work, she’d go home, slip into her new pull-over and then sit on the bench she had constructed out of the bones from her nine dead husbands and think “life is good!”